Samhain Meditation 2: The Descent by Mage of Machines

The Descent by Mage of Machines is an approximately one hour meditation journey to the Underworld and the Isle of Apples under the protection of Inanna to commune with the Beloved Dead. The music was written, composed, and performed by Sarah Thompson, also known as Mage of Machines. You’ll recognize a little bit of this album as the show intro and exit music for This Week In Heresy.

Some of you, if you had attended Pantheacon in 2013, will also recognize this music. The Circle of Cerridwen, with friends, performed The Descent in a live dramatization and dance with an early edition of the music. The final edition of the album was released on Samhain 2013.

Sarah Thompson is your Guide. Inanna is voiced by Calyxa Omphalos, and Rev. Gina is the voice of Ereshkigal. The script was written by Rev. Gina and Sarah Thompson.

This is offered as a Samhain blessing for you, as a gift to the community, and to honor the Beloved Dead.

The album version of The Descent is available via iTunes. If you are looking to purchase it through other platforms, click here.

Click here to to listen (player will open in new window).

Holy Week: What I’ve Learned

It’s Holy Week. The last week of my working, which ends on Sunday night.

It’s interesting to look at this working from (almost) the other side. I was kind of nervous about doing it, really, since I hadn’t really done something quite like this before, but I know now that I didn’t need to be nervous about it. Going through it was definitely work and I learned a lot.

From Hecate I learned to let go of people and things that I couldn’t do much about (and about curbing the obsession I can get sometimes with wanting to know everything about people). I also was reminded that I can’t stay in death working mode all the time, and that unless I’m needed in that capacity, that I should save it for Samhain.

From the Dagda I learned why it’s important to ask for help because it’s hard and draining to do it all yourself. (I did improve my cooking skills, though.) I also learned a lot about self care from Him, too, including treating my body with care. What I remember most is that on a bad body image day, He said to me: “If I, as a god, can have a big belly, so can you!” I also realized after His part of the working that it’s best for me to get up a couple of hours early, before I start writing, to have breakfast and do my meditation, or else the brain doesn’t wake up enough.

From Jesus I’ve been learning more about what His role in my life is. He’s more about my public priesting. In other words, His is the ministry that I emulate in public: doing my best to help those who need it, praying, and doing my best to heal in the areas that I minister in. I’m also learning more about my monastic nature at the moment, figuring out how I want to do my monasticism, and how regular ritual can be comforting and grounding.

Overall, I’ve learned just how important daily practice is for me, even on the days where I don’t feel like it. Especially on those days. I have much more confidence in my spiritual work and spiritual connections. A friend of mine mentioned a few weeks ago that we didn’t really learn what it meant to be a contemplative in seminary. I agree. I really wish we had learned more about being contemplative and religious life. It definitely provides a wrapper for my days that helps me be more on focus (especially with my writing) and on task. The other really good side benefit is that my mental health is vastly improved. My anxiety is way way down, and I haven’t had any lengthy depression (some small bouts, but those were more hours than days). Also, minimal interaction on Facebook has also been a big plus for me. (YMMV, but for me, this has been really good.)

I’m going to keep doing the morning and evening meditations, although, I’m not sure exactly how the evening meditation is going to manifest. I’m liking the Compline prayers, since reading from a paper and following instructions is easier at the end of the day when you’re tired. There are a few things I want to add to my altar, too, to tie things all together.

But, I’m at the end, and it’s been quite the experience.

Noodling About My Lenten Working

I’ve mentioned it in a few places, but I’m doing a Lenten working so that I can get closer to the Spirits that I regularly work with. I’ve been feeling lately that I’ve been…neglectful of? distant from? my deities, but I’m also in a change state with my ministry. What I thought I would be doing after I graduated has morphed into something different. This isn’t a bad thing, really, as it seems I’m being polished and honed into what feels right.

Maybe my “not being settled” in my own spiritual work is what is contributing to my not wanting to read theology. There are times where hardcore theology just makes me want to scream since it seems like way too much noodling about what’s “right” or what the theologian thinks. I suppose that’s the point of the more hardcore systematic theology (which, in most circumstances I do actually like). It frustrates me because I’d rather be “doing” my theology than just thinking about it. I did plenty of thinking about it in seminary, and now there’s a restlessness to be doing things.

Not that I haven’t been doing things, but I think I’m finally coming into the “right” things for my own ministry. The podcast, writing, teaching in my coven, teaching about radical inclusion in the pagan community, and teaching about about body shame and how not to do it in a spiritual setting. You know, when I look at that list, that’s a lot of stuff to do.

But, to do this work, I need to be more grounded in my own spiritual work and spiritual self, which I’m not really so much so at the moment. I’ve always had a monastic, contemplative bent, and so the big parts of my working are going to be daily meditation (at set times), and specific daily work pertinent to the deities I’m working with.

I’m kind of nervous about it since I’m not sure what I’ll be or have when I’m through the other side of this working. I’m hoping to have a stronger relationship with my deities (Hecate, The Dagda, Jesus), and come out with a daily practice that works for me.

One note about this: Part of the agreements I have with the Spirits about this is that I’ll be doing minimal social media during this time. I already block Facebook and Tumblr on my devices between 10 am and 6 pm Pacific. I will have Facebook Messenger on my phone and other devices, but the best way to reach me is to email me. I’ll be on Twitter, too but not quite as much. People can also text me, but the overall best will be email.

We’ll see where this goes, but I think, overall, it’s going to be a good thing for me.

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